Pilgrims complete religious devotion in “12 pubs” – one for each disciple

Written by Sarah Garvey

Topics: Europe News, Irish News, World News

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Thousands of pilgrims across the world have been pledging their devotion to Christ ahead of the Christmas season, in a devotion colloquially referred to as “12 Pubs”.

Debate remains over the origins of the devotion, which sees Christians undertake a gruelling display of digestive agility while imbibing large amounts of water which has been turned into wine. Some are of the opinion that there are 12 stages to mark each of Jesus’ apostles, with many claiming the “Judas pub” to be the most difficult and most likely to result in projectile vomiting.

“Like Judas, the drink turns on you and comes back the way it came from” said one pilgrim.

Others think the 12 stages symbolise the 12 stations of the cross and insist on carrying a “cross” with them at all times.

“You get the ugliest, mouldiest looking Christmas jumper you can get your hands on. People point and laugh and try to shame you, like Jesus carrying his cross through the streets of Calvary. The woolen baubles are my cross to bear” said Colm, of Ballina.

Representatives of the Catholic Church have praised the devotion.

“It’s nice to see young people engaging with the church” said Fr. Feelem of Cloyne Diocese. “It’s not quite as grisly as those mad Filipinos who nail themselves to crosses every year”.

He also praised the pains followers have taken to be as accurate as possible to the source material.

“They’re denied water even if they feel like they may need it, as Jesus was denied it on the cross. They partake in acts of sin, stealing glasses and beer mats, to show that we are all sinners and that is why we need religion –  to repent. They re-enact Jesus falling with the cross very convincingly outside pubs across the country. Then, they exhibit great mental strength in continuing on their path. At the end of the devotion, they pay homage to Jesus being offered vinegar on the cross by consuming vast quantities of salt and vinegar chips in Supermacs establishments – Pat McDonagh being a great supporter of young Christians”.

In response to reports of some public houses refusing to permit participants of the “12 pubs” entry, Fr. Feelem said that “these tavern owners have taken the place of the inn-keeper in Bethlehem in saying that there is no room at the inn and have obviously fallen into unchristian ways. We pray for them”.

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